Choking

Edgar Allen Poe had it right when he said "We loved with a love that was more than love." I mean, he was half right. Because I loved you with something I can't even define. Your breaths took mine away. Your eyes grasped my soul, what I fucking had of one, and they warmed it. You gave me a home in my body. You gave me a smile on my broken face. You kissed my scared arms and you looked me in the eyes, with no shed of sympathy, but with what I thought was love. But no; that love was ripped away from me. It was stolen from me because someone saw the weak spot in us and used it until your breaths became something I could only dream about, and your eyes looked at me like I was a God damn shadow on the wall. You were my fucking air and now I'm choking. I used to be able to stand up and feel life, because you were the first person ever to show me how to be me. Now? Now the floor has never felt so good. When "as long as I can" turns out to be a day on the calendar, that's when I realize how easy it was for me to break. You taught me to love, but you also taught me how to remain numb.